I watched my mother-in-law play those games for many years before dementia robbed her of the ability. And I recall my grandmother's hold over her sons. I devoutly hope I will not do teh same to my own children.
Perhaps you should write her a letter explaining that you are happy to stay in touch, but that you are too busy to be able to make any regular commitment of time? Writing creates a useful distance.
Yes, we all have those guilt mechanisms - I know any phone call to my mother is likely to leave me in the wrong - so sometimes I avoid making one, and then I'm in trouble for that too. In this instance you are absolutely in the right. If she'd been a frequent visitor to your mother and offered help in her care you might have had a debt to repay. As it is, you really, truly owe her nothing beyond common civility.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Perhaps you should write her a letter explaining that you are happy to stay in touch, but that you are too busy to be able to make any regular commitment of time? Writing creates a useful distance.
Yes, we all have those guilt mechanisms - I know any phone call to my mother is likely to leave me in the wrong - so sometimes I avoid making one, and then I'm in trouble for that too. In this instance you are absolutely in the right. If she'd been a frequent visitor to your mother and offered help in her care you might have had a debt to repay. As it is, you really, truly owe her nothing beyond common civility.
Here's a pretty Spike icon to cheer you up.