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Monday, December 1st, 2025 06:45 pm
Not being an Alexander the Great fangirl, I had never read the primary sources (which were written centuries later, because all the contemporary sources on AtG were lost) on everyone's favourite Macedon, but now I got around to reading at least Plutarch. And you know, if there is ONE thing not just the late Ms Renault and her trilogy but the entire internet led me to believe, it's that Hephaistion was Alexander's One True Love And Soulmate; even absolute homophobes concede him as the friend of friends, the Patroclos to Alexander's Achilles, etc. So imagine my suprrise when I stumbled upon these few paragraphs by good old Plutarch:
Moreover, when he saw that among his chiefest friends Hephaestion approved his course and joined him in changing his mode of life, while Craterus clung fast to his native ways, he employed the former in his business with the Barbarians, the latter in that with the Greeks and Macedonians. And in general he showed most affection for Hephaestion, but most esteem for Craterus, thinking, and constantly saying, that Hephaestion was a friend of Alexander, but Craterus a friend of the king.
For this reason, too, the men cherished a secret grudge against one another and often came into open collision. And once, on the Indian expedition, they actually drew their swords and closed with one another, and as the friends of each were coming to his aid, Alexander rode up and abused Hephaestion publicly, calling him a fool and a madman for not knowing that without Alexander's favour he was nothing; and in private he also sharply reproved Craterus.
Then he brought them together and reconciled them, taking an oath by Ammon and the rest of the gods that he loved them most of all men; but that if he heard of their quarrelling again, he would kill them both, or at least the one who began the quarrel. Wherefore after this they neither did nor said anything to harm one another, not even in jest.
Craterus? CRATERUS? And he "abused Hephaistion publicly?" Hephaistion - who in fiction shows up eternally chill and calming emo Alex down - was jealous of some guy who wasn't at least Bagoas? Truly, this is not what I expected.
To be fair: Plutarch also later describes the complete breakdown and momentous grief for Hephaistion when Heph dies. (Oh, and he does mention Bagoas as well, to wit: We are told, too, that he was once viewing some contests in singing and dancing, being well heated with wine, and that his favourite, Bagoas, won the prize for song and dance, and then, all in his festal array, passed through the theatre and took his seat by Alexander's side; at sight of which the Macedonians clapped their hands and loudly bade the king kiss the victor, until at last he threw his arms about him and kissed him tenderly. ) Still. I feel let down by the OTPlers.
Not really surprised, though. This kind of thing happens constantly in Frederician fandom.
To celebrate the latest example of research making everyone more complicated, I'm linking this gem, which includes both Alex and Fritz:
Moreover, when he saw that among his chiefest friends Hephaestion approved his course and joined him in changing his mode of life, while Craterus clung fast to his native ways, he employed the former in his business with the Barbarians, the latter in that with the Greeks and Macedonians. And in general he showed most affection for Hephaestion, but most esteem for Craterus, thinking, and constantly saying, that Hephaestion was a friend of Alexander, but Craterus a friend of the king.
For this reason, too, the men cherished a secret grudge against one another and often came into open collision. And once, on the Indian expedition, they actually drew their swords and closed with one another, and as the friends of each were coming to his aid, Alexander rode up and abused Hephaestion publicly, calling him a fool and a madman for not knowing that without Alexander's favour he was nothing; and in private he also sharply reproved Craterus.
Then he brought them together and reconciled them, taking an oath by Ammon and the rest of the gods that he loved them most of all men; but that if he heard of their quarrelling again, he would kill them both, or at least the one who began the quarrel. Wherefore after this they neither did nor said anything to harm one another, not even in jest.
Craterus? CRATERUS? And he "abused Hephaistion publicly?" Hephaistion - who in fiction shows up eternally chill and calming emo Alex down - was jealous of some guy who wasn't at least Bagoas? Truly, this is not what I expected.
To be fair: Plutarch also later describes the complete breakdown and momentous grief for Hephaistion when Heph dies. (Oh, and he does mention Bagoas as well, to wit: We are told, too, that he was once viewing some contests in singing and dancing, being well heated with wine, and that his favourite, Bagoas, won the prize for song and dance, and then, all in his festal array, passed through the theatre and took his seat by Alexander's side; at sight of which the Macedonians clapped their hands and loudly bade the king kiss the victor, until at last he threw his arms about him and kissed him tenderly. ) Still. I feel let down by the OTPlers.
Not really surprised, though. This kind of thing happens constantly in Frederician fandom.
To celebrate the latest example of research making everyone more complicated, I'm linking this gem, which includes both Alex and Fritz:
