Wednesday, January 7th, 2026 01:44 pm
I shall miss the stars.

Not that I shall stop looking
as they pattern their wild will each night
across an inchoate sky, but I must see them with a different awe.
If I trace their flames’ ascending and descending –
relationships and correspondences –
then I deny what they have just revealed.
The sum of their oppositions, juxtapositions, led me to the end of all sums:
a long journey, cold, dark and uncertain,
toward the ultimate equation.
How can I understand? If I turn back from this,
compelled to seek all answers in the stars,
then this – Who – they have led me to
is not the One they said: they will have lied.

No stars are liars!
My life on their truth!
If they had lied about this
I could never trust their power again.

But I believe they showed the truth,
truth breathing,
truth Whom I have touched with my own hands,
worshipped with my gifts.
If I have bowed, made
obeisance to this final arithmetic,
I cannot ask the future from the stars without betraying
the One whom they have led me to.

It will be hard not ask, just once again,
see by mathematical forecast where he will grow,
where go, what kingdom conquer, what crown wear.
But would it not be going beyond truth
(the obscene reduction ad absurdum)
to lose my faith in truth once, and once for all
revealed in the full dayspring of the sun?

I cannot go back to night.
O Truth, O small and unexpected thing,
You have taken so much from me.
How can I bear wisdom’s pain?
But I have been shown: and I have seen.

— Madeleine L’Engle
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Tuesday, January 6th, 2026 06:26 pm
First book of 2026! This was The Orphan's Tales: In the Night Garden by Catherynne M. Valente with illustrations by Michael Kaluta. I have no recollection of how this ended up on my TBR and I was a little skeptical checking it out in the library, but I'm glad I stuck with it because it ended up being a lot of fun and I will definitely check out the second volume.

You might be a little confused in the beginning, as In the Night Garden is a series of nested stories within stories and the style takes a minute to get used to, but it's worth it. Valente unfolds a veritable matryoshka of tales into neat blooms whose petals all fit together. Retroactive reveals and recontextualiations are delightful here. 

Valente's vivid prose brings together her fantastical tales with such clarity; she attends frequently to all five senses, so that the reader knows what the characters are not only seeing, but hearing, smelling, tasting, and feeling as well. There's obviously a lot of fairy tale inspiration here, but Valente definitely brings her own flavor. Women are almost always the hero of Valente's tales (though they play the villains too!) and there are such a great variety of them. Monsters abound too, but they get their chance to tell a tale too. (There's also some gentle ribbing at the Arthurian legends, with one witch lamenting about "all that questing" princes get up to.)

I was so engrossed in the work I didn't realize until quite late in the book how little romance factors into it. In a fairy tale inspired book like this, I would have expected a great many characters motivated by romance, but I can only think of two here who are primarily motivated by a love interest, and this delights me too. I'm arospec myself and while I enjoy a good tale of romance, I also weary of how frequently and totally it is centered in stories, so I was really enthused by how little that's the case here.

Friendship and family relationships do make frequent appearances though, and the friendship between the orphan teller of tales and the young boy hanging onto her words is the framing story. Love between mother and daughter, between brother and sister, even between strangers is a common thread.

She also avoids a pitfall I see in various modern fantasy stories which are so keen to explain the magic of their world they strip it of all mystery. Valente's world remains largely unexplained and asks the reader to simply take it as it is, which I found fun and appropriately mysterious.

The style of the book allows Valente to pull in a great many diverse characters and voices, which she does it well. Most impressive though is her ability to pull a cohesive tapestry out of all the various threads she's juggling.

A really fun and unusual story which I enjoyed a lot--a great start to a new year of reading!
Tuesday, January 6th, 2026 09:28 pm
Snowflake Challenge: A warmly light quaint street of shops at night with heavy snow falling.

Challenge #2: Pets of Fandom

I originally wasn't going to do this one because it got me thinking about Phoebe and I was sad, but then I decided I wanted to talk a little about Phoebe and let myself be sad.

CN: Pet death )
Tuesday, January 6th, 2026 07:25 pm
Having one of those days where I feel like running off to live in a cabin in the woods. Or like, digging a burrow and never coming out.
Tuesday, January 6th, 2026 06:56 pm
Back at work, but thankfully 1. I don't have to commute, and 2. we are having no-meeting week, so I can just cross one major task off my list every day without adding new things like meeting notes or whatever.

I think the thing I've enjoyed most about the ancillary explosion of joy around Heated Rivalry is the two hockey podcasts that engaged fully and open-heartedly with it (well, and the proliferation of "Ilya gets added to the WAG chat" fic). Normally hockey podcast bros are not a species I have time for (aside from not being good at podcasts or audiobooks in general), but the Empty Netters dudes were super adorable in their reviews, and they also interviewed Ksenia Daniela with great excitement and are scheduled to have Hudson Williams and Connor Storrie on soon.

I also enjoyed What Chaos's less in-depth but still positive look at the show, and they have a couple of interviews with Jacob Tierney available that I haven't watched yet. I was also very pleased when, during a discussion about Shane's ginger ale habit, one of the dudes started talking about a restaurant(?) that lets you choose ginger ale or 7Up for your Shirley Temples, and I was like, "gotta go with ginger ale on that" and then the guy was like, "and the ones with ginger ale are great!" Because that is the legit truth, my friends. I'm not saying I won't drink a Shirley Temple with 7UP, but I am saying that the ones with ginger ale are 1. how we made them when I was a kid, and 2. better. I was reminded of how we ordered one every night at the free cocktail hour on that cruise we went on back in 2015, which definitely made an impression on the staff. *g* (Princess Donut also approves.)

So I feel like those were a great extender of joy, if you are in need. It's really lovely to see some cishet hockey dudes becoming fans of m/m romance.

In other fannish news, I just read that Sebastian Stan may be in Matt Reeve's The Batman, Part 2 and I don't want to get my hopes up or get fixated on a specific part for him to play, but like, wouldn't he be a fantastic Harvey Dent/Two-Face??? GIVE IT TO ME.

Scarlett Johansson has also been rumored to be involved somehow, and she'd have to be like, Poison Ivy, right? Though maybe they're going with more of a Mask of the Phantasm type thing and she'll be Andrea Beaumont? But I am not sure I buy Battinson as having a girlfriend before Selina, and also, why would you try to compete with Mask of the Phantasm? It's so good, you're just setting yourself up for not measuring up. (I guess she could be Talia, but I hope not.)

I guess we'll see what materializes! I'm kind of sad that they are not in continuity with James Gunn's Superman, because that would be fun to see.

*
Tuesday, January 6th, 2026 05:46 pm
Well, some good news? I misread the Bed Bugs notice on the entrance of my apartment building. Not surprising - considering it was in tiny print. ( I brought home my reading glasses from work to read it properly.) I read after I asked a neighbor if we should be worried about it - and he looked at me quizzically, and said, not really, although I'm always concerned.

Then I read it. It stated:

Units: 81
Inspected: All
Infested:0
Cleaned: 0
Number found: 0

And the date of the inspection.

No wonder I was confused. Without my reading glasses, 0's look like 8's and 9's.

I worried about this all day long, went on the internet (which of course made it worse) - and finally convinced myself to read the sign in the lobby again, but with my reading glasses this time around.

Whew. No bed bugs in the building.

***

Now, I just have to figure out the will - first things first complete it, have it reviewed by lawyer, then sent, notarized and witnessed. And try not to worry about the knees. I'm icing both now. And hobbling very slowly up and down steps. Plus side? I'm grateful I moved years ago to this apartment complex - it's highly accessible for folks with ailments. It has a ramp to the entrance, so you can avoid the two steps. Then once inside - two elevators. So I don't have to go up and down the steps. And, I can either do laundry in the basement or send it out to be down - still without having to go up and down steps. I can also order food to be delivered to me.
Not certain about pharmaceuticals (other places yes, just not sure about my pharmacy).

***

Thought about the Spike/Buffy ("Spuffy") and Angel/Cordy ("Cangel") relationships, and Read more... )

I liked how the writers delved in the nasty consequences of using another person to "get off" or using sex as a drug. While alcohol and other drugs - are problematic, using sex as a drug is kind of similar to vampirism - in that you are using someone, with little care to how they feel, to get yourself off. Our society tends to handwave that - or generalize and state all consensual and kinky sex is bad, ie demonize the people and the act of sex (particularly if the act varies from whatever is considered the norm). (Let's face it - our global society and culture has serious issues regarding sex and sexual behavior. Always has. They also like to generalize (no despite what people might think we all don't experience sex the same way, our bodies are very different from each other, and no two people experience or need the same thing in regards to it, everyone is different). Part of our problem is - we can't talk about it in a way that doesn't involve ribald humor or running for the hills. A lot of folks can't say the words vagina and penis. And come up with other words for these parts of their anatomy.) One of the things I loved about Buffy is how the writers satirized societal views regarding sex and the culture's relationship to sex. Read more... )
Tuesday, January 6th, 2026 05:35 pm
Testing, Testing

I'm going to post something without coding the text color, just to see if a change I made with help from [personal profile] muccamukk  will do that. 

Woo-hoo! It worked! 
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Wednesday, January 7th, 2026 08:18 am
部首
心 part 10
总, general/always; 怼, to flame; 恋, love pinyin )
https://www.mdbg.net/chinese/dictionary?cdqrad=61

词汇
长途, long-distance; 延长, extend pinyin )
https://mandarinbean.com/new-hsk-4-word-list/

Guardian:
什么东西总会有变化的, everything always changes
他是不是失恋啊, do you think he has a broken heart?
[no 长途 or 延长]

Me:
谈恋爱并不简单。
如果没有时间写作业,到下次延长也可以。
Tuesday, January 6th, 2026 04:23 pm
Five Years Ago

This happened. 

I will not forget. Nor will I forgive. 
Tuesday, January 6th, 2026 04:46 pm
This went live today:

https://theneworleans.ca/2026/01/06/orleans-needs-more-public-libraries/
Tuesday, January 6th, 2026 12:21 pm
Clearing out the last of my movies watched last year.

We Bury the Dead (2026). After an American experimental weapons accident kills every human and animal on Madascar, an American woman (Daisy Ridley) comes to help identify bodies and search for her husband who was on a work retreat there. Also sometimes the dead don't stay dead.

As someone who is pretty over zombie movies, I liked this one quite a bit. First of all, it's Australian, and boy can you feel it. This is not your Hollywood zombie blockbuster or even your Danny Boyle zombie blockbuster. For starters, we spend relatively little time running from or fighting zombies. In fact, these are the most ambiguously threatening zombies I can remember seeing in a long long time, and I liked how much that complicated the story. It's also beautifully shot with great atmosphere and a score that really adds to the mood of the whole thing. And I really appreciated how our understanding of the central couple's married relationship gets more complicated as the film goes on.

That said, spoilers )

This movie feels like it invites comparison to 28 Years Later, if only by accident, given the timing. I know 28 Years Later has a lot of fans, and I didn't hate it, but overall I liked this a lot better for the indie feel, the focus on a female character, and honestly because I liked the cinematography better.

Anyway, it's out in theaters now. If it sounds fun, I recommend it!

--

Red Rooms (2023). A French-Canadian film about two female true crime fans following the trial of a man accused of raping and murdering underage teen girls. This movie is beautifully made, and with really visible care and precision. The director knew what he wanted to make, and he went for it. The result is moody and fucked up without ever feeling exploitative (to me); this is very much about the groupies, not about the man on trial, and we never seen the horrifying footage at the center of the trial.

It's also shippy as hell. Our main gal Kelly-Anne is a wealthy model and computer hacker who professes herself to be "not bad with numbers," who's obsessed with the trial for reasons that are to some extent left to the viewer, while Clementine is a less well-heeled diehard apologist for the man at the center of the trial and is convinced he's innocent. Somehow out of these two, it's Clementine who feels like the more well-adjusted person; it's questionable whether Kelly-Anne has any friends at all, and yet maybe Clementine becomes one. As a friend of mine described it, "Clementine’s more open neediness draws out a reciprocal vulnerability from Kelly-Anne."

High rec from me. If any of this sounds appealing to you, definitely check it out.
Tuesday, January 6th, 2026 09:20 pm
Third headache day in a row; this sucks. (Today is a bit better than yesterday, but I want it to go away! *kicks it*)

Today's writing

Just a little [community profile] fandomtrees work, but I'm really losing momentum here. :(

(I did finish my [personal profile] candyheartsex letter last night, at least. Now I just have to hope someone requests something I can write ... Sign-ups are still open until tomorrow, btw!)

Tally

Day 1: [personal profile] alightbuthappypen, [personal profile] badly_knitted, [personal profile] brithistorian, [personal profile] carenejeans, [personal profile] chanter1944, [personal profile] china_shop, [personal profile] cornerofmadness, [personal profile] goddess47, [personal profile] luzula, [personal profile] philomytha, [personal profile] sanguinity, [personal profile] shadaras, [personal profile] sylvanwitch, [personal profile] the_siobhan, [personal profile] trobadora, [personal profile] ysilme

Day 2: [personal profile] alightbuthappypen, [personal profile] badly_knitted, [personal profile] brithistorian, [personal profile] carenejeans, [personal profile] chanter1944, [personal profile] china_shop, [personal profile] cornerofmadness, [personal profile] goddess47, [personal profile] sanguinity, [personal profile] shadaras, [personal profile] sylvanwitch, [personal profile] the_siobhan, [personal profile] trobadora, [personal profile] ysilme

Day 3: [personal profile] alightbuthappypen, [personal profile] badly_knitted, [personal profile] brithistorian, [personal profile] carenejeans, [personal profile] chanter1944, [personal profile] china_shop, [personal profile] cornerofmadness, [personal profile] goddess47, [personal profile] luzula, [personal profile] sanguinity, [personal profile] shadaras, [personal profile] sylvanwitch, [personal profile] the_siobhan, [personal profile] trobadora, [personal profile] ysilme

Day 4: [personal profile] alightbuthappypen, [personal profile] badly_knitted, [personal profile] brithistorian, [personal profile] carenejeans, [personal profile] chanter1944, [personal profile] china_shop, [personal profile] cornerofmadness, [personal profile] goddess47, [personal profile] luzula, [personal profile] sanguinity, [personal profile] shadaras, [personal profile] sylvanwitch, [personal profile] the_siobhan, [personal profile] trobadora, [personal profile] ysilme

Day 5: [personal profile] badly_knitted, [personal profile] brithistorian, [personal profile] carenejeans, [personal profile] chanter1944, [personal profile] china_shop, [personal profile] cornerofmadness, [personal profile] goddess47, [personal profile] luzula, [personal profile] sanguinity, [personal profile] shadaras, [personal profile] sylvanwitch, [personal profile] trobadora, [personal profile] ysilme

Day 6: [personal profile] china_shop, [personal profile] trobadora

Let me know if I missed anyone! And remember you can drop in or out at any time. :)
Tuesday, January 6th, 2026 03:12 pm
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Fanfiction
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1073: Shelter by [personal profile] desecrets (G | Third Doctor, Delgado Master)
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Tuesday, January 6th, 2026 10:57 am


Once upon a time, the moon Panga was industrial and capitalist and miserable. Then robots suddenly and inexplicably gained self-awareness. They chose to stop working, leave human habitation, and go into the wilderness. The humans not only didn't try to stop them, but this event somehow precipitated a huge political change. Half of Panga was left to the wilderness, and humans developed a kinder, ecologically friendly, sustainable way of life. But the robots were never seen again.

That's all backstory. When the book opens, Sibling Dex, a nonbinary monk, is dissatisfied with their life for reasons unclear to themself. They leave the monastery to become a traveling tea monk, which is a sort of counselor: you tell the monk your troubles, and the monk listens and fixes you a cup of tea. Dex's first day on the job is hilariously disastrous, but they get better and better, until they're very good at it... but still inexplicably dissatisfied. So they venture out into the wilderness, where they meet a robot, Mosscap - the first human-robot meeting in hundreds of years.

I had previously failed to get very far into The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet, so I was surprised by how much I enjoyed this novella. It's cozy in a good way, with plenty of atmosphere, a world that isn't quite perfect but is definitely one I'd like to live in, and some interesting philosophical exploration. My favorite part was actually Dex's life as a tea monk before they meet Mosscap - it's very relatable if you've ever been a counselor or therapist, from the horrible first day to the pleasure of familiar clients later on. I would absolutely go to a tea monk.

I would have liked Mosscap to be a bit more flawed - it's very lovable and has a lot of interesting things to say, but is pretty much always right. Mosscap is surprised and delighted by humanity, but I'm not sure Dex ever shakes up its worldview in a way it finds true but uncomfortable, which Mosscap repeatedly does to Dex. Maybe in the second novella, A Prayer for the Crown-Shy.

And while I'm on things which are implausibly neat/perfect, this is a puzzling backstory:

1) Robots gain self-awareness and leave.

2) ????

3) PROFIT! Society goes from capitalist hellscape to environmentalist paradise.

Maybe we'll learn more about the ???? later.

But overall, I did quite like the novella. The parts where Dex is a tea monk, with the interactions with their clients and their life in their caravan, are very successfully cozy - an instant comfort read. And I liked the robot society and the religious orders, as well as a lot of the Mosscap/Dex relationship. I'll definitely read the sequel.
Tuesday, January 6th, 2026 10:04 am
(Which is def not me procrastinating on homework on the second day of a new term.)

If you use a rich text editor to post to DW so that it does all the coding for you, and you don't have to worry about it, it has the potential to make your posts very difficult to read without clicking through to see the journal in your style. A lot of the rich text editors override the page layouts and styles selected by the user (ie, in this case, me, who is not very tech savvy, so apologies if the terminology is wrong, please correct me in comments!).

To show you what it looks like... please click through, rather than expanding the cut tag )

It could also be an issue if you force your font to a particular typeface or size, which overrides people who set their journal style with a typeface/size that they need for accessibility reasons (e.g. low vision or dyslexia).

I'm not trying to call anyone out! (The styles are made up examples.) I don't want to discourage using rich text editors, which make posting so easy for people. I just think that everyone is maybe not aware that this is how their posts look on people's reading page.

I've never used a rich text editor, so I have no idea how to tell it just to post text without modifying the colour/size/typeface, but maybe someone in comments can let me know?

There's probably also a way to make my browser strip out people's customisations, though times I've tried that it's ended up with some pretty odd results, so I gave up on it.
Tuesday, January 6th, 2026 11:11 am
Music Meme, Day 17

A song that reminds you of somebody:

When I first came to Chicago in 1981, I stayed with one of the friends I'd made when I attended Suncon, the 1977 world science fiction convention, and my very first convention. His name was Ed Sunden and he was overwhelming. He was awful and generous, outrageous and brilliant, manipulative and kind, and definitely sui generis. He loved music, and he loved introducing me to New Wave music that was definitely new to me - the Police and Elvis Costello among the groups he loved. 

His way of introduction? He would tell me to sit down in the tiny living room of the basement apartment he shared with Joan, the woman who became his wife. Or rather, he would order me to sit down, and then he'd put on an LP, or power up a tape he'd recorded on his music system (primitive by today's standards, but incredibly impressive back in 1981.) Sometimes he'd play the same song twice, to make sure I understood the words. 

All these years later, and 25 years after he died, it's Elvis Costello's songs that immediately bring Ed and that dim little apartment singing and shouting back into my mind.

I thought of sharing "Oliver's Army" with you, because it's one of the Costello songs that really hit me when I first heard it. Unfortunately, and despite the fact that Costello wrote the song as an anti-fascist tune, it uses at least two racist slurs that I'm uncomfortable listening to these days. He wrote it after being in Northern Ireland during The Troubles, and the Oliver he sang of was Oliver Cromwell, who invaded and conquered Ireland. British fascists have taken Cromwell as one of their own, so Costello's brutal parodying of fascism and how it sucks working class kids into a losing game in this song is close to perfection in terms of the written word. Still, the racial slurs, parodies though they are, made me nix this tune. 

In its place, and most definitely one that still makes me think of Ed, is "Pump It Up."  Enjoy, and if you want to know my previous answers, go to Day 17, and it will give you access to all the previous songs.