I always thought I'd keep my life at some distance from this journal, but I find now that I can't keep up the cheery facade of memes and chitchat. Thing is, my mum has terminal cancer and probably only weeks to live. And that's what my life is right now. The past several months - all last term really, for those on the academic schedule - she's been ill, and I've known she's been ill, but it's only this week that it's been confirmed for sure that this is what's happening. It's a relief in a way to have it out in the open and to know what's going on and to have something to shake a fist at instead of what has been constant grinding anxiety. I'm dumping all but one of my courses for the rest of the term and now have to learn to face a world without the person I've been caring for for the last 15 years. And of course have loved for all my years. She's my friend, not just my mum, and I'm going to miss her. Badly.